27 Jun Judge Jimmy
Judge Jimmy,
I recently received a rather unsatisfactory salary review at work. Personally, I feel as though I can do better and having recently binged Succession, am hoping to find inspiration from the infamous Roy family. Do you have any tips on how I can get myself a more favourable outcome?
Cheers,
Hannah
Ahhh, the exhausting world of salary reviews, where the battle for better compensation begins! While I can’t promise you a family empire like the Roys from Succession, I can offer you some unconventional advice on leveraging their power dynamics:
- Be sure to channel your inner Logan Roy: Adopt a commanding presence and intimidating demeanour during the negotiation. Just make sure you don’t throw any expensive objects or scream “F**k off” like the real Logan. We want you to keep your job!
- Invoke the spirit of Shiv: Channel your cunning and strategic prowess. Play mind games with your employer, dropping subtle hints about your willingness to explore other opportunities or reminding them of your invaluable contributions. Remember, it’s all about maintaining an air of indifference while secretly plotting your ascent.
- Embrace the Roman Roy approach: Harness the art of provocative remarks and cheeky sarcasm. Insult your boss’s taste in office décor, make snide comments about their decision-making skills and leave them second-guessing their stance on your salary increase. Just be careful not to cross the line into full-blown insubordination!
- Team up with Cousin Greg: Find yourself an ally within the firm who can provide support and insider information. Together, you can navigate the treacherous legal landscape and uncover the secrets that will give you the upper hand. Just don’t let Cousin Greg accidentally spill the beans!
Now, while these tactics may be amusing to contemplate, it’s essential to approach salary negotiations professionally and with a level-headed mindset.
Research market rates (or speak with one of Montgomery’s very knowledgeable consultants), highlight your achievements and articulate your value to the firm. Remember, Succession may be entertaining, but real-life success comes from a combination of skill, preparation and a dash of confidence.
Best of luck and may your salary review result in a victorious outcome worthy of Logan Roy’s approval!
Now “f**k off!”.
Judge Jimmy
